“Dear Vladimir Putin” – Comedian Vir Das wrote a hilarious poem about Putin and Indian Mother

Dear Vladimir Putin,

I’m so sorry, I was not your mother.
Because then you’d have an Indian mum,
And we are like no other.

Before you’d invade anyone or even try,
I’d beat your ass with a slipper of Havai.

I wouldn’t fuck around with weak ass sanctions.
I’d lock you in your room, in your big ass mansion.

If you threatened to set the west on fire.
I would have pre-told the mohalla my son is a liar.

I’d buy you lux cozy undies. I’d make sure they were tight.
So your small dick energy, doesn’t crave nuclear fights.

I wouldn’t give you time to do military passes.
Because I’d sign you up for 27 tuition classes.

And just before you make a decision the world might regret.
I’d arrange your marriage to someone you’ve never met.

And then me and your dad would enjoy our life.
I’d go from being chutiye ki mumma, to a chilled out wife.

Vir Das

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